When I first heard the term child-led learning I thought it was wonderful. Letting children take the lead in their learning was a new and exciting concept for me 8 years ago.
But in the past few years, that phrase started to bother me.
I want my kids to be self-directed learners. I want their interests and passions to be at the center of their learning.
I also thought about the term facilitator- a word that’s usually used alongside unschooling. Parents of interest-led learners help their children get the resources they need to accomplish their dreams. They take them places and give them assistance.
But even the term facilitator didn’t really articulate the role that I play in my children’s lives.
Then I heard a conversation a few weeks ago where someone described their role as an unschooling parent as a guide. I had finally found the word I’d been searching for to describe my role as an interest-led learning mom!
Traits of a personal tour guide
Picture yourself in a new city. You’ve read some guidebooks and have some idea of the types of things you’d like to do while you’re there. But you decide to hire a personal guide because he has inside knowledge about the city and can suggest just the right things for you to do.
So what can a personal guide give you that a guidebook cannot?
#1 Insider knowledge
A personal guide knows what time is best to go to a popular museum, the best place to eat on your budget, and local events and places of interest not mentioned in guidebooks or big travel websites. A guide will also answer your personal questions on the spot while you are touring. You can have an immediate back and forth dialogue about what you are seeing.
As interest-led learning parents, we have special insider knowledge, too. We’ve lived a lot longer than our children and have knowledge that they don’t. We can suggest activities or resources before they ask for it because we have had more years to develop that type of knowledge.
We can guide our children to places they’d never heard of before, or ideas and topics they might not otherwise consider.
#2 Suggest things to do that match your current interests and warn you of what to avoid
A great guide will ask you lots of questions about yourself and your interests. He won’t plan a tour without knowing what types of things you’d like to see and do. Once he gets to know you better, he can suggest things to do that will match your current interests.
A personal guide will also give you great tips on places and things to avoid. He knows the places that don’t really live up to the hype. He knows what types of things will really just be a waste of your time. If you ask him about going to a certain place or doing a certain activity, he’ll tell you his honest opinion. He’ll still take you there if you really insist on going, but he’ll provide reasons why it’s best to avoid it.
We know our kids well because we spend so much time with them. When we ask them questions about what they love to do, we get a better idea of what they want to spend their time doing. We observe and see what things make them come alive.
We also know the things that drag them down. We know the activities that hold no interest for them and that leave them frustrated and depleted. We’re in a unique position as their personal guides to point out activities and topics that might not be best for them right now. We don’t want to stand in their way, but we want to point out obstacles and hindrances they might not be able to see.
#3 Introduces you to places to go or things to see that you might not have considered otherwise.
A personal guide doesn’t wait until you ask to see something to show it to you. He knows from his questions and conversations with you if you might be interested in something. He doesn’t wait for you to ask about a particular place to visit or activity to do; he readily provides suggestions without you asking.
He will also share interesting tidbits and trivia about whatever it is you are seeing together. He points out unusual or interesting things along the way. He will often share knowledge and information that you never would have thought about asking before.
As interest-led learning parents, it’s our privilege to show our children as much of the world as we can. Along the way, we can share interesting things we have learned – things that have fascinated us and that we think will fascinate our children, too.
The most important thing about a personal tour guide is that he is there for you. He doesn’t come with his own agenda. He may come prepared with suggestions and ideas, but he lets you set the tone and pace for the tour. He leaves you filled with fascinating new information, a new perspective on what you have seen, and most times, a desire to learn even more on your own.
That’s the type of personal guide I want to be for my children, too.
Photo Credit: David McKelvey
What are your thoughts on being a guide for your children?